Reflecting on 28

A week and a half ago, I very quietly celebrated my 28th birthday. I went to work, came home, then went out to eat with my girlfriend at a cute restaurant here in SF, and called it a night. It was the perfect birthday.

Even though I haven’t been publishing here as often lately, I’d still like to reflect on my previous year of life and share some thoughts.

The older I get, the more I appreciate the value of relationships. In particular, all good relationships are formed from the foundation of a healthy relationship with yourself. I see the value in self-care, attempting to eat well, exercising regularly, and nurturing a curious mind. I’ve learned this year that the way you treat yourself is also an indicator to others. If you neglect this important relationship with yourself, you are setting a low bar for everyone else you encounter. It’s not that you need to command respect from everyone you meet, but you should at least feel internally that you are worthy of it.

Another lesson I’d like to share is about making commitments. Life is full of commitments to other people. You make commitments to your family, friends, an employer, and a faith. While we live seemingly with free will, we also are bound by our decisions to these people and ideas. The act of making a good commitment is indeed a skill, and one we must perfect the older we get.

On a similar note, the final thought I want to share is this powerful idea of long-term thinking. There was an article in the WSJ by Warren Buffett called, “Short-Termism is Harming the Economy”. Basically, he describes how companies fudging numbers to improve short-term earnings ultimately end up worse off later on as a result. I think my generation in particular, struggles with this same ailment.

For millennials, the concept of long-term thinking is a dying skill. We do things like order groceries to our apartments and call rides with apps on our phones. The next episode must start in five seconds or less and the thought of waiting longer than two days for a package to be delivered (for free) borders on ludacris. But all this instant gratification has altered our expectations and hindered our ability to make really long-term decisions. We have become the kids from the famous marshmallow experiment, gorging ourselves on the first mallow laid on our plates.

As a result, more opportunities are available, to those who are willing to make long-term investments. Resisting instant gratification is something I continuously battle, but also a trait that I’ve identified with success later in life.

Thank you for sticking with my infrequent writings over the years, here’s to many more to come.

Make it Simple

Hi there! It’s obviously been awhile since I last published anything new here. Usually, when I get an idea I want to share, I’ll think it over for a bit to first make sure it's worthy of sharing. But, when it's finally time to write, I’ll have either mentally moved on or failed to prioritize my time well. It’s a shame, really. Because I love publishing here, and it’s embarrassing that there’s such long gaps in between my posts. But, like most things, I’m probably way overthinking it.

Which, by the way, brings me to the main point for this post. I was walking home from work the other week, when I suddenly had the urge to tweet this out:

There are no “secrets” to success, wealth, or happiness.

— Brian Hertzog (@bhertzog) January 30, 2018

My "urge" was actually caused by a terrible Twitter ad by a famous marketer, hocking his “secrets to success” and IMHO, duping people out of their money in exchange for a clearly fictional promise land.

I then elaborated on my rant explaining, most people already know everything they need to know to achieve any of these things, but what they’re actually looking for (and in this case paying for) is a shortcut.

But, how do you shortcut something that’s already pretty simple? For example, here are some things I wrote down that make me happy:

family, friends, time at home relaxing, the feeling after a beautiful long run, a cup of coffee and a good book, listening to a beautiful song on good speakers, cuddling with someone and watching a movie, playing, the feeling I get when I help someone in a meaningful way, being in good physical shape, learning how things work, improving my skills, cooking dinner with a good friend

Does happiness need to be more complicated than this?

None of the above is a one-time solution that will bring happiness for all days to come, but looking for some magical “secret” is a fool’s errand.

Perhaps it’s just our nature to overcomplicate things. But lately, my mission has been to see through the crap and make it simple.

Try this. Next time you catch yourself stressing over a decision or problem, ask: “What would it look like if this were easy?” Chances are, there've been solutions under your nose that for whatever reason, seem too inconvenient or simple to be viable. But, they're not. They are real effing answers.

So in an effort to keep things simple, I’ll do better to post here more frequently. Also, I've noticed quite a few new subscribers tickling in through my email list, so thank you, whoever you are, and welcome everyone reading my work for the first time. If you found this post useful, I’d love it if you shared it with just one friend, or if you have feedback, feel free to email me directly: brianjhertzog AT gmail.com